This summer is winding down. It's sad for me think about because next August, Grace will start kindergarten! The things people tell you like, "rock them while you can, they grow up fast" are true to the core. I look back and think...I wish I had played in the floor with the kids more, I wish I hadn't flipped out over that, I wish I didn't spank over that, I wish I didn't or I wish I did ....blaaah. I think it's especially hard to be a stay-at-home mom who chose to be at home but who had some big struggles w' strong-will, tempers, etc (being home is harder than I thought but I wouldn't trade it for anything). I remember when I quit teaching 5 years ago. I thought I was taking the easy path. Little did I know that being home round the clock with my sweet children would sometimes push every button I have. My imperfections have been brought to light :( but the good part is it has given me the opportunity to try to get better in my weak areas. I am thankful I have been able to rock and talk and sing and teach and make messes and play but I'm ashamed of all the times I chose the wrong things as priorities! I understand now why there is a DEGREE in early childhood development and when you stay home, you basically should get that degree by experience! I also understand better why having a daily relationship with God is so important. Who else would I turn to this morning and say, "Please help me to not scream. Amen." And who else would rejoice wholeheartedly when Noah John says, "Pray to the Lord, mommy" before I tuck him in at night? So there are pros and cons to being a full-time mom and wife...but I've decided mostly pros!
The last month has been so nice. We have enjoyed each other, the kids have (most of the time) been easier and fun. It's an answered prayer. Anyway, here is a picture I want to share but I also want to share something from a study I'm in right now. To paraphrase, the author says that sometimes we have to look backward in order to correctly more forward. Does that make sense? So we've been digging into past stuff from our family lineage to understand why we're sometimes prone to make the same mistakes etc. Looking back can be therapeutic as long as you don't stay there...you have to move forward with faith and fun and in my case, hopefully, get better at this parenting stuff... See if you get the connection in this photo :). Happy late summer. Happy early fall. We have had a blessed one. God is the blesser. The giver. Our hope. Our center. He is our beginning and end! Alpha and Omega.
Last but not least, Shawn and I took the kids to Chucky Cheese to bid a final farewell to summer 2011. I don't think the kids will be asking to go back anytime soon. It was ok but mostly we all enjoyed being together. The games were too old for the kids. We had to lift Noah J up to play them and when he rode a ride he wanted off after about 3 seconds because he was so distracted (it reminded me of Vegas for kids!?). Anyway, it was a fun night...just not what we expected. It ended at Outback. We tried Chic Fil A but it was 9 and they were closed to which Grace said, "Ahh...nits and nats!" I don't know where she heard that but it was funny.
Next post will be a farm post...between pumpkins, mums, and baking, how can I not!
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